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Bad Teacher

Comparison:

  • Theatrical Version
  • Unrated
Release: Oct 31, 2011 - Author: Muck47 - Translator: Tony Montana - external link: IMDB
Compared are the Theatrical Version and the Unrated Version (both available on the US DVD and Blu-ray released by Columbia Pictures)


- 19 differences, 8 of themwith alternate footage
- Difference: 339.4 sec (= 5:39 min)



In Bad Teacher, Cameron Diaz enjoys playing the textbook example of a pleb who reluctantly stays on her job as a school teacher after the rich fiancé broke off the engagement and left. In Justin Timberlake as substitute teacher, she finds a new victim to rip off but she's not the only one after him and she ignores the better alternative, sports coach Jason Segel.
One shouldn't expect any surprises, twists or sth. from the plot and the full potential of the satire element with regard to the school system hasn't been tapped either. Certainly no must see but it's quite entertaining and that could only be achieved with the amazing actors. Especially the scenes with How I Met Your Mother star are really worth seeing.

As usual, the home media release contains an Unrated Version which is being announced with "extra raunchy footage" on the US cover. And also as usual, the promise hasn't been kept. I must admit there are lots of dialogs that are much ruder in the Unrated Version (among other words, she drops the C-Bomb) and there's also a sexual background now like the "not really having sex" sex scene with Timberlake and Diaz but that's not really worth mentioning. So technically, it's like adding deleted scenes but not adding footage too rude for an R-Rating. Real bummer. The characterization hasn't improved either.
But on the other hand, the added footage doesn't lower the pace - so there's no reason to complain. And besided, the US releases contain both the R-Rated and Unrated Version so it shouldn't be a biggie at all.



Running times refer to
Theatrical Version in NTSC / Unrated Version in NTSC
Alternate
05:50-05:51 / 05:50-05:54

In the Unrated Version, Elizabeth adds: "And I was gonna suck his dick. So two presents."
The mother of her soon-to-be ex (Steven) mumbles: "Mmm-hmm."

The Theatrical Version contains an extended shot of Steven instead (no screens).

Unrated 3.3 sec longer




07:41 / 07:44-07:48

Amy Squirrel also says: "Somebody needs a hug."
Elizabeth decliningly: "Somebody doesn't."

4 sec




10:12 / 10:19-11:56

A new scene after lunch break with Lynn: Elizabeth is hitting on some guys in the evening in a bar. Her counterpart turns out to be a useless trainee, she wakes up sleepy in the following morning.

Elizabeth is wearnig glasses while sitting at the bar lasciviously. A sleazy guy arrives: "You, me, Aruba, my boat, this weekend, what do you say?"
Elizabeth: "You think I don't see that faint tan line on your finger where your wedding band usually is? This is not my first rodeo, Sarge. Why don't you introduce me to your single co-worker? One o'clock."
The co-worker introduces: "Hey, I'm Jason."
Elizabeth: "Hi."
A couple of hrs. pass by, as one can recognize because there are lots of empty shots and they're dancing as well.
Jason: "So that's where I learned to water ski."
Elizabeth: "I fucking love Lake Geneva."
She provokingly stares at his belt: "I love your belt! Who makes it? We should do something next weekend. You should take me somewhere. You don't have a plane, do you?"
Jason: "Yeah, right. I'm just a trainee."
Elizabeth lets go off him at once: "A what?"
Jason: "A trainee."
Elizabeth: "How much more time are we talking here?"
Jason: "Tomorrow's my last day. The second I finish, I'm going to my boss's office, and I'm telling that motherfucker to go fuck himself. See, I wanna do something that matters. I'm going back to school and becoming an occupational therapist. I wanna do something important, just like you."
Elizabeth is grossed out: "An occupational therapist? Do I look like I wanna marry a fucking occupational therapist?"
Now, she's alone again and moves her glasses to prepare for the next victim.
The following morning, the alarm clock rings shortly after 5 a.m. Still tired out, she says: "Fuck my ass."

96.2 sec




Alternate
16:39-16:42 / 18:23-18:44

In the Theatrical Version, Elizabeth only says: "I'll be back."


The Unrated contains an alternate shot of hers, she remains silent. In the off, the dialog from the following additional scene begins: she tries to scrounge some money from her relatives on the phone.

- "I just really need some money. As a matter of fact, it is about my tits, Dad. Well, maybe if I had gotten yours and not Mom's..."
- "Look, I'm not gonna beat around the bush, Grandma. I'm dying and I need money for surgery."
- "Really? Nothing!"
During the last words, she knees next to a car with a knife in her hand and arranges that the car will have flat tires.


Unrated 18.5 sec longer




Alternate
18:18-18:20 / 20:20-20:25

Alternate shot of Elizabeth (screens only taken from the Unrated Version) after Sasha Abernathy made the car wash offer. Only in the Unrated Version, she replies with: "I got some Mexicans that already do it for nothing." Then Sasha slightly earlier.

Unrated 3.1 sec longer




24:41 / 26:46-28:20

Two additional scenes after the conversation in the men's room.
At first, Elizabeth talks to Lynn about Scott. Then she's being surprised with a surprise test for all students.


First, they have an encounter with Amy in the hallway. Amy gives them the evil look.
Lynn: "How are things going with Scott?"
Elizabeth: "Jesus Christ, Lynn. The guy just went through a terrible breakup. What he needs now more than ever is a friend."
Lynn: "You know, I think that's really smart. Build a foundation..."
Elizabeth: "Yeah, build a foundation and then after my surgery, pow, we fuck."
Lynn: "I don't know. I think love should be about..."
Elizabeth drückt ihr den Abfall von ihrem Essen in die Hand; "I gotta go, Lynn. Here, hold this for me."
Lynn: "Okay. Thanks."

At the classroom. Elizabeth is reading a magazine about breast surgery (there's going to be a hint to that in the Theatrical Version later on).
One of the students asks: "Are we starting School Ties today?"
Elizabeth finishs the article first, then she reaches for a remote: "Okay. Today we're starting School Ties. Brendan Fraser plays a Jew. Classic."
When another teacher enters, Elizabeth pretends to be working: "Okay, who has the answer?"
The woman puts a package on the desk: "Here it is. Good luck."
Elizabeth: "Here 'what' is?"
Woman: "It's the pre-test for the state standardized test. It was in the memo."
Elizabeth looks at and untouched shelf: "Ah! Yes, the memo."
The woman leaves and a plump boy makes a pit fart.
Elizabeth: "Hey, zip it. Zip your shit."
She puts the test on the table in front of Sasha and says: "Okay, look. We all know that these tests are gay."
A shot of a guy with a pink top follows and Elizabeth comments that with a "Hey." She keeps talking: "According to this memo, I'm supposed to give you guys 45 minutes per section. Bla, bla, bla, bla... Okay. Clear your desks, everybody. Pencils out. Begin."

94.3 sec




25:07 / 28:46-28:57

Elizabeth also says: "Hey. You are just making a habit out of this, aren't you?"
Scott changes the subject and starts talking about the incident from a previous extended scene: "Actually, Sandy Pinkus in the math department, I guess someone slashed his tires. And his wife's, too."
Elizabeth, not very convincingly, says: "That is awful."

11.1 sec




Alternate
31:16-31:18 / 35:06-35:12

In the Theatrical Version, Elizabeth bends over and says "Watch your feet!"


The Unrated Version begins with an alternate shot of Sasha. Then Elizabeth says: "All right. I'm high as fuck. I gotta get outta here. Watch your feet."


Unrated 4.6 sec longer




Alternate
33:26-33:28 / 37:20-37:29

In the Unrated Version, Elizabeth says about Amy: "How do I put this politely? She's a lesbian. She hates cock."
Scott is surprised and response with: "Oh."

In the Theatrical Version, the following shot of Elizabeth starts earlier and she also says "Trust me..." first (no screens).

Unrated 6.6 sec longer




45:36 / 49:37-49:39

Elizabeth screams "Fuck!" and hits the breaks which is why her head ends up on the car dashboard.

2.7 sec




Alternate
45:42-45:45 / 49:45-49:48

Alternate shot of them in the car. In the Unrated Version, Lynn is busy with the seatbelt which is why she's speaking slower. She doesn't have the seatbelt problem in the Theatrical Version, so adds "Amy wins every year!" after explaining the bonus system.

Unrated 0.2 sec longer

Theatrical VersionUnrated




Alternate
45:46-45:47 / 49:49-49:51

For continuity reasons, the Unrated Version contains an alternate shot when Lynn mentions the trophy money.

Unrated 0.5 sec longer

Theatrical VersionUnrated




47:35 / 51:39-51:42

Now a first additional shot at classroom after the attack in the sports hall.
Elizabeth: "Focus. You know this shit. Come on."

3.1 sec




47:38-47:41 / 51:45

The shot of Elizabeth checking out nude women in magazines is also in the Theatrical Version (see also 24:41 / 26:46-28:20).
In comparison to the Unrated Version, the Theatrical Version only shows one page of the magazine and the shot of Elizabeth before is also different.

+ 3.1 sec




48:31 / 52:35-52:48

After Twilight tossed the ball back in the sports hall, a short additional scene at the shared apartment of Elizabeth's follows. She asks her roommate Kirk about the breast surgery.

Elizabeth: "Hey, what do you think of me with Jessica Simpson's tits?"
Kirk: "Go bigger."
Elizabeth: "What do you think of me with Pamela Anderson's tits?"
He repeats "Go bigger." but he says it with more expression this time.

13.3 sec




During the shot of pod-smoking Elizabeth in her car, the incoming phone call from the off is different. The call extends over the following footage (Theatrical Version: still Elizabeth in her car / Unrated Version: the shot of her in the car gets interrupted by additional scenes).
In the Unrated Version, Elizabeth calls in sick at first. Then the mentioned additional scene. Not until then, the call she gets the call she also got in the Theatrical Version. The first 6 seconds have been combined with the end of the second additional shot.

Now we have an alternate audio track but the footage of Elizabeth in the car remains unchanged: "Hey, it's Elizabeth Halsey. Unfortunately, I'm not gonna make it in today. My grandmother took a turn for the worse and it looks like she's dead, so I'm off to the funeral. Wish me luck."

Subsequently, two differences in the footage.


53:22 / 57:39-57:43

Before Elizabeth takes a bite at the wheel, the Unrated Version contains a shot of Scott at class. He's dressed up and, suitable for his disguise, he says: "Tom Sawyer!"

4.3 sec




53:28 / 57:49-58:47

Now a new scene, which is quite long, in the Unrated Version. Elizabeth visits Kirk in the gym and asks for help.

A muscled guy bitches with Kirk who's reading a magazine: "Yo, Bitch Tits. I'm not gonna ask you again, dude. I need those coupons mailed today."
Kirk: "Consider it already done."
He intends to keep reading when Elizabeth shows up: "Hi."
Kirk sends her to a backroom: "Back here. Come on."
Now a woman in another room. She explains: "This is GHB. You take one capful before you go to sleep. And you won't believe the difference it'll make in your workouts. You'll look even more amazing."
Elizabeth: "What are the side effects?"
Woman: "Diarrhea, heart palpitations, nothing major. Just don't take it during the day, you'll be out like a light."
Kirk repeats: "Out like a light."
Woman: "Hey, Bitch Tits, you send out those coupons?"
Kirk: "I was not told about any coupons."
Elizabeth: "Well, I can't wait to get buff."
Woman: "How about you send me some JPEGs, so I can monitor your progress?"
Elizabeth: "You got it, boss."
New shots of Elizabeth doing her make in the car up follow. That's when the incoming call from the off was audible in the Theatrical Version.

(BTW The transition to the equal footage of the Theatrical Version totally sucks because the front shots of hers are very similar which is why it looks like a jumpcut.)

58 sec




Alternate
60:47-60:49 / 66:06-66:15

In the Theatrical Version, Elizabeth responds to Amy's naughty comment with making a face.


In the Unrated Version, she hits back.

Elizabeth: "Got my eye on someone, but he's dating a major cunt. Pardon my French."
Amy seems to be shocked, Scott obviously didn't get it and says: "No, no. She sounds terrible."


Unrated 6.9 sec longer




67:55 / 73:21-77:33

Scott says: "I've been fantasizing about this ever since we got to Springfield."
He keeps making the sex moves and Elizabeth, who's kind of distracted by that, says: "This? Oh, yeah. Me, too."

11.8 sec





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